Think before you speak.

I ran into a couple yesterday that at one time I counted as friends. We have drifted apart in recent years. First, because they moved to Colorado and second because they became so ensconced with the GOP that their lives and attitudes towards everything changed. (Interesting enough this on the heels of his conversion into a very right-wing “bible” church.)

They were in town for the dedication ceremonies of the Bush Library at SMU.  I said it was interesting to see five living Presidents on the stage all at the same time. “Kind of historic, don’t you think?” I said. There was nothing political about the statement in any way.  It was simply the perspective that it is truly a rare occasion to have five leaders of the free world, the most exclusive club in the world, all together at the same time. The husband immediately shot back,” Well, I only counted four Presidents. Obama is an imposter.”

I said, ”Bill, I labored through eight years of George Bush and President Chaney, but at least I didn’t call them names.” (Idiots was only a descriptor.) Bill’s wife had recently passed around a cartoon on the Internet with the world “asshole” describing our current Commander-in-Chief. “How is it that your vile is so great now against a man who has at best been a moderate Democrat?”

“He is ruining everything America has stood for. Everything.”

“Everything?” I asked.

“Yes. Obamacare is undermining America’s freedoms. His outrageous taxes are crippling the economy. And his secret wars both on our soil and abroad are undermining American’s foreign policy that we have worked for decades to establish.”

“Like invading a sovereign country for no reason. Like Bush did with Iraq?”  He ignored by fact-filled jab. “Weapons of Mass Destruction?”  I asked. He again ignored me.

“John, the man is turning us into the Soviet Union. Right before our eyes.”

“With Obamacare?”

“Yes. It is socialism rampant through our land.”

“Bill, you went to college. Sally, you learned to read and write.  What happened to you two? Have you closed your eyes to facts?  Obamacare is based on private enterprise. Insurance companies, owned by American stockholders offering insurance under the mandate of a government program to insure that every American has health coverage — that is what it is. It is not, by any stretch of the imagination socialized medicine. It even came from a conservative Republican think thank: the Heritage Foundation. The Republican nominee had the same law enacted in Massachusetts when he was governor there. Where did you get your stuff? Fox News?  Rush Limburger?  Did you know that up to 49% of adults in the U.S. do not have adequate care right now. And in 2014 that changes. They will have available to them insurance. And to their kids and wives and any pre-existing needs will be covered.”  This is especially good for Sally who had breast cancer a few years ago and I know that they were turned down by several insurance plans a few years back. My point struck home.

“Well some things are good about it, I suppose.”  This was Sally now.  Bill was still having no part of it.

“He is destroying America. He is a complete communistic bastard.”

There it had been said. A pejorative had been used. “If I had called Regean or Bush (either one of them) a bastard or and asshole, like you two have done, you would be on me like flies to the slaughter. “Un-American, you would say and you would point your boney fingers at me and denounce me. But you can get away with it because you have your political-religious convictions behind you making it okay not only constitutionally but biblically, as well.  You two are white trash.”

I walked away in disgust. Later that afternoon, Sally called me to apologize for their harsh words and actions. “It hasn’t been the same since his conversation,” she told me. “He is as radical as those two nut jobs in Boston.”

“I know, Sally.  That is what disturbs me. He is sounding more and more like a lot of right-wing Americans. They speak louder and louder and think less and less.  And Bill used to be real bright. Very bright. Now he is a programmed automaton. And Sally, you’re not far behind him.  I hope you two get help.”

She began to cry. I wish I felt sorry for her, but I think the pain came from inside, not from my words but from her self-conviction that she knew how wrong she and Bill have been.

I want all my readers to have political convictions. I want them to express their point-of-view. I want them to be able to stand up and say, “I disagree with this President or this congressman or that state legislator. I want to put forward a different perspective.” But what I am tired of is the name-calling and the finger pointing at the President of the United States who was elected by a huge majority of the people of this country and be called vile and villainous names.

He doesn’t deserve that. The office doesn’t deserve that. Our country doesn’t deserve that. It is time for civility. Time for the rancor to subside.

President Obama is the leader — our leader. You may not like him and some of his policies, but he is the man we elected to be in charge. Just like we had to sit and watch under Bush, you may have to bite your tongue and do the same with Obama. That’s how the game is played. In four years (3.5 now…) you can vote someone new into that office. But remember this. He or she will not be perfect. They have a job to do and they will do it with the best of their ability aimed at helping America as they see it. And it might not be the way you see it. But none of the leaders on that stage at SMU, and none that I can see in places of power (no matter how heatedly I disagree with them) are trying to destroy America.

Get the fuck over it.